So I was
going to a party last night and facing an age old dilemma. When to show up?
Sure the
invitation said that the party started at 5 pm, but we all know that 5 can
often mean, “that’s when I hope to have all my work in the kitchen complete so
I can take off the apron and socialize.” But there’s an unspoken code that one
should never arrive right on time or even, heaven forbid, a little early. “Fashionably late” was the catchphrase I
remember hearing when I was growing up.
But how late is too late? I had a
friend who was so well-known for being late that we would tell everyone but her
that the party started at 6, and tell her that it started at 5, thus
guaranteeing she would arrive at 7 pm, slightly more than fashionably late but
not too bad. Tell her it was at 6 and
she would arrive after the main course was cold, bringing an appetizer dish,
and surprised to see people starting to leave.
Which if you
are highly anxious and slightly socially awkward is not a bad strategy. Instead of a roaring party of thirty or 40,
arriving unfashionably late instead means a quiet group of maybe 8-10
introspective folks pleasantly tired out from all the noise and bustle.
Then there’s
the perennial question when you go to a party of what to wear and what to
bring. When they say that you should
bring yourself, do you believe that or do the socially appropriate bottle of
wine only to find they have a palette for only French or Spanish and California
just won’t cut it. Blue jeans? Kilt?
Sweatpants? For some folks, this is nothing
to lose sleep about, but for others, it is the source of much anxiety and
stress.
Some people
love hosting parties, planning menus, surrounding themselves with friends and
family. But they might be worried about
which way the Dow Jones is going or getting an infection from some well-meaning
person who has a cold.
Some may
have a fear of spiders or be nervous about large crowds or about being alone. Some may studiously avoid all kinds of things
because of their fears, and others might keep themselves so busy that they
never have time to stop and think about what they are afraid of.
Some might
be afraid of what others will think and do their best to be appropriate in all
situations. Others might not even be
able to articulate what they are afraid of, but just know that they are afraid. And many are really afraid of leadership.
So many
times I have done a speech or made a presentation or given a sermon or read
scripture and had people come up to me and say, “I could never do that, I’m too
afraid.”
If only they
knew. You see, no one I’ve ever talked
to who does what I do are doing it because we are totally brave and
fearless. No, the secret to doing brave,
leaderlike things is to do it despite the fear.
If I had waited until I was fearless, I would still be a stay-at-home
mom drinking hot chocolate and reading books.
Even Broadway actors say that the day they stop feeling the butterflies
in their stomach, that’s the day they need to leave the stage because they have
stopped respecting the audience. Famous
people, folks like Dame Maggie Smith are afraid to watch their movies and
television shows because they are so critical of themselves, and so afraid of
the reactions of others.
The only
difference between people whom we think of as brave and people like us who are
afraid is that the brave folks look their fear straight in the eye and say, “I’m
going to do this anyway. This is so
important to me that I’m not going to let you stop me.” It’s how we were inspired as a nation to block
Hitler’s attempt to take over the world.
It’s how we stood up to people in this province who wanted to chisel away
at public healthcare.
We showed up
on the steps of the legislature and pounded our drums to declare that humans
had the right to be treated equally and with dignity. We signed petitions and showed our support of
the importance of human rights for all regardless of where they came from, what
they looked like or who they fell in love with.
And we must continue to do so.
Christian
leaders look at the big picture of what we are called by God to do. We want to make the world a little more like
heaven on earth for everyone. We want to
help people shine like the lights they are supposed to be. We want to bring God’s dream of justice and
peace for all to this world.
Christian
leaders also look inside. Am I doing
what is in the best interests of others?
Where am I reacting out of fear and where am I acting from a
God-centered place of calm and peace? We
are, like the Psalmist, constantly going back to our faith. God is our light and our salvation, how can
we be afraid? When we look at our
motivations and actions by the light of God, we can then make good healthy
decisions for the whole of the community.
Jesus did not call religious experts, lawyers and politicians into
following him, he called fishermen covered in slime with rope burns on their
hands and dirt under their fingernails.
He called them into leadership roles, even though they did not know it
at the time. He called them into a new
way of being community, a new way of living in the world. It would have been scary, but they came and
followed anyway. What are you being
called to do? What kind of leader is God
training you to be? Know that when you
wait for God, you will find courage, and see God’s goodness here on earth. May it be so for us all!