Showing posts with label victim. Show all posts
Showing posts with label victim. Show all posts

October 22, 2024

Thinking Outside the Box

“All Around the Mulberry Bush, the monkey chased the weasel… Pop goes the weasel!” Remember having one of these when you were a kid?  Or maybe giving one of these to a kid?  Out comes the Jack in the box and it always seemed surprising even though we knew what would happen. 

The big draw of this toy was that surprise of the jack in the box jumping out and looking bigger than the box it jumped out of.  How did such a tall clown come out of such a small box? 

The scriptures today talk about God and Jesus as being bigger than we could imagine.  The reading from Job is a classic Jack in the box story, and also reminds me of the cliched advice, “Be careful what you ask for, you might get it!”  Job has been building up a case against God; Job felt like God was a business partner to be bargained with, and his friends didn’t help much.  They believed firmly in karma, that if you do something wrong, you would reap the consequences and if a disaster falls on you, it must be your own fault.

That’s still a common belief in today’s world too.  It’s a nasty form of blaming the victim, and it’s meant to comfort ourselves.  “That won’t happen to me because I do things properly” which can mean anything from vitamins to crystals.  Job was written to challenge that assumption.  It is the original “Why bad things happen to Good People” story, designed to wrestle with that hard question.  Job put together a legal argument as if he was a well-trained lawyer.  God had treated him with injustice by letting Job experience some heart-breaking disasters, a business failure and lastly a devastating physical illness.  And Job set out his case that he did not deserve any of it.  If this was karma, karma got the wrong guy and he could prove it!

He turned the crank on his complaints to God until pop!  Unexpectedly, God came to give Job an answer.  Not a particularly comforting answer, mind you.  God says, “Are you as big as me? As powerful as me?  As creative as me? As smart as me?  Nope!” Not much of an answer, and certainly not a comfort either.

Except that it is a reminder to Job that however Job imagined God, God was bigger than that imagination.  God could not be stuffed into a box until Job turned the crank. 

James and John also thought they had Jesus pegged.  They thought they had figured out what box he belonged in.  The box of political leader and reformer who would start a revolution to depose the Herods and the Pilates of their world. Except that Jesus wouldn’t stay in that box either.  He wasn’t going to become a stereotypical rebel who takes down the local tyrant, only to become the next tyrant.

That’s a real pattern in history.  It happened in France when Louis 16 was deposed and four years later, Napoleon Bonapart was the head of France, living like a King.  The many Roman emperors that killed their predecessor then were assassinated by the next.  Russia was the same, and anyone who read Animal Farm in school will remember that. Even Israel at the time of Jesus would have remembered Herod the Great becoming king by attacking the current king with the help of the Roman army.  Leaders rose and fell, and politics was a dangerous game.  James and John figured that Jesus was going to end up with power and influence, maybe even a throne.  But Jesus wanted something bigger.

Not political leadership but moral, ethical, spiritual and religious leadership.  Leadership that inspires and encourages us to think bigger.  Leadership that thinks outside the box about the big picture, not our big pictures, but God’s big picture.  Leadership that inspires, empowers and includes us in God’s picture.

We humans like to feel we are in control of our small little universes.  Or if we aren’t in control, there’s something wrong and we turn to blame.  We blame ourselves, we blame others, we blame God.  We label others and ourselves as a way of feeling like we control the world, we know how things should be going.  And when, like Job, bad news comes, or someone refuses to stay in their box, we don’t know how to respond. We ask Jesus to be seated in a power position next to him.  We ask God for certainty and control.  We get instead, a command to serve one another and a vision of the universe as vast and diverse.  A command to think outside the box. A command to think beyond our small universes into a vision of community.

Jesus wanted his disciples to be community, not hierarchy.  To be servants to each other.  One of the Moderator’s books we read says, “We thank God for giving us community who live by God’s call, by God’s forgiveness and God’s promise.  We do not complain of what God does not give us, but thank God for God has given us enough, a community of flawed Christians journeying through struggles and need and disillusionement together.”[1]  Like Job, James and John, we struggle in life.  Unlike Job and like James and John, we have community.  And unlike James and John, we know the commitment Jesus made to this new way of thinking about God and community that was so amazingly outside the box.  Together as servants of one another, and supported by God’s amazing power and grace, we can build a vision of community that is heaven on earth, that is outside the box and that keeps surprising us in amazing ways.  God’s vision of our community, our church, is far bigger than we can imagine, so let us be open to the surprise of seeing that vision pop out in unexpected ways.  May it be so. Amen. Vintage Matty Mattel Clown Jack in the Box -1950's - Working! - YouTube

“All Around the Mulberry Bush, the monkey chased the weasel… Pop goes the weasel!” Remember having one of these when you were a kid?  Or maybe giving one of these to a kid?  Out comes the Jack in the box and it always seemed surprising even though we knew what would happen. 

The big draw of this toy was that surprise of the jack in the box jumping out and looking bigger than the box it jumped out of.  How did such a tall clown come out of such a small box? 

The scriptures today talk about God and Jesus as being bigger than we could imagine.  The reading from Job is a classic Jack in the box story, and also reminds me of the cliched advice, “Be careful what you ask for, you might get it!”  Job has been building up a case against God; Job felt like God was a business partner to be bargained with, and his friends didn’t help much.  They believed firmly in karma, that if you do something wrong, you would reap the consequences and if a disaster falls on you, it must be your own fault.

That’s still a common belief in today’s world too.  It’s a nasty form of blaming the victim, and it’s meant to comfort ourselves.  “That won’t happen to me because I do things properly” which can mean anything from vitamins to crystals.  Job was written to challenge that assumption.  It is the original “Why bad things happen to Good People” story, designed to wrestle with that hard question.  Job put together a legal argument as if he was a well-trained lawyer.  God had treated him with injustice by letting Job experience some heart-breaking disasters, a business failure and lastly a devastating physical illness.  And Job set out his case that he did not deserve any of it.  If this was karma, karma got the wrong guy and he could prove it!

He turned the crank on his complaints to God until pop!  Unexpectedly, God came to give Job an answer.  Not a particularly comforting answer, mind you.  God says, “Are you as big as me? As powerful as me?  As creative as me? As smart as me?  Nope!” Not much of an answer, and certainly not a comfort either.

Except that it is a reminder to Job that however Job imagined God, God was bigger than that imagination.  God could not be stuffed into a box until Job turned the crank. 

James and John also thought they had Jesus pegged.  They thought they had figured out what box he belonged in.  The box of political leader and reformer who would start a revolution to depose the Herods and the Pilates of their world. Except that Jesus wouldn’t stay in that box either.  He wasn’t going to become a stereotypical rebel who takes down the local tyrant, only to become the next tyrant.

That’s a real pattern in history.  It happened in France when Louis 16 was deposed and four years later, Napoleon Bonapart was the head of France, living like a King.  The many Roman emperors that killed their predecessor then were assassinated by the next.  Russia was the same, and anyone who read Animal Farm in school will remember that. Even Israel at the time of Jesus would have remembered Herod the Great becoming king by attacking the current king with the help of the Roman army.  Leaders rose and fell, and politics was a dangerous game.  James and John figured that Jesus was going to end up with power and influence, maybe even a throne.  But Jesus wanted something bigger.

Not political leadership but moral, ethical, spiritual and religious leadership.  Leadership that inspires and encourages us to think bigger.  Leadership that thinks outside the box about the big picture, not our big pictures, but God’s big picture.  Leadership that inspires, empowers and includes us in God’s picture.

We humans like to feel we are in control of our small little universes.  Or if we aren’t in control, there’s something wrong and we turn to blame.  We blame ourselves, we blame others, we blame God.  We label others and ourselves as a way of feeling like we control the world, we know how things should be going.  And when, like Job, bad news comes, or someone refuses to stay in their box, we don’t know how to respond. We ask Jesus to be seated in a power position next to him.  We ask God for certainty and control.  We get instead, a command to serve one another and a vision of the universe as vast and diverse.  A command to think outside the box. A command to think beyond our small universes into a vision of community.

Jesus wanted his disciples to be community, not hierarchy.  To be servants to each other.  One of the Moderator’s books we read says, “We thank God for giving us community who live by God’s call, by God’s forgiveness and God’s promise.  We do not complain of what God does not give us, but thank God for God has given us enough, a community of flawed Christians journeying through struggles and need and disillusionment together.”[1]  Like Job, James and John, we struggle in life.  Unlike Job and like James and John, we have community.  And unlike James and John, we know the commitment Jesus made to this new way of thinking about God and community that was so amazingly outside the box.  Together as servants of one another, and supported by God’s amazing power and grace, we can build a vision of community that is heaven on earth, that is outside the box and that keeps surprising us in amazing ways.  God’s vision of our community, our church, is far bigger than we can imagine, so let us be open to the surprise of seeing that vision pop out in unexpected ways.  May it be so. Amen.



[1] Paraphrase from p 28, Dietrich Bonhoeffer Life Together: the Classic Exploration of Christian Community Harper & Row, 1954

November 28, 2023

Haven’t I seen you somewhere?

Ever have one of those moments when you see someone that you think you know from somewhere but you’re not quite sure how you know them?  And you say something like “Excuse me, you look familiar” in hopes that you can figure it out.

It doesn’t take much for me to struggle with faces and remembering who people are.  I was surprised to learn that there’s a condition called face blindness where some people have such a poor memory for faces that they don’t even recognize themselves in the mirror.  I’m not that bad, but when a young man snuck up on me at a concert last March, it took me a whole 3 seconds to recognize him as my own son!  It causes awkwardness when people remember me better than I remember them..  It’s one of those skills people take for granted but it doesn’t come easily, any more than making eye contact is for many neurodivergent people.

So the sheep and the goats in Matthew’s parable didn’t recognize the King when he showed up unexpectedly to sort things out.  Not surprisingly, they were confused and bewildered when the King thanked them or scolded them for his treatment.  They all had face blindness when it came to the ruler of all!

They were surprised to be judged in such a way.  Regardless of whether they were sheep or goats, the shock was great for everyone.  They didn’t expect to be herded into groups, they didn’t expect to be called to account for their behavior, and they certainly didn’t expect the rewards or the punishment they were given. 

Judgement is not a topic we feel comfortable talking about in the United Church.  We preach a more loving God who forgives everything and loves everyone.  And when we define God as infinite love, that’s an easy conclusion to make.  Who can resist infinite love?  But the gospel of Matthew is sprinkled throughout with stories like this.  Stories of bringing down the powerful people who bullied Matthew’s community.

Stories of God making things right, like the words from Ezekiel: “I am stepping in and making things right between the plump sheep and the skinny sheep. Because you forced your way with shoulder and rump and butted at all the weaker animals with your horns till you scattered them all over the hills, I’ll come in and save my dear flock, no longer let them be pushed around. I’ll step in and set things right between one sheep and another.”

We all know what it’s like to be butted by a stronger person.  It leaves us feeling vulnerable, anxious and frustrated.  We struggle to figure out how to respond.  Should we butt back?  Should we run away?  Sometimes we turn around and butt someone else instead.  We may not intend to become the one who butts others, but it happens.  Some of us don’t even realize that we are butting people.  God is not impressed.

At a workshop on Tuesday for clergy in Norther Spirit Region, there was a guest speaker who talked about his community’s project to reduce butting.  It was called “Voices Against Bullying” and it was started after a 14-year-old boy was killed on the grounds of his high school.  Research and resources were developed to help families, teachers and children learn about ways to reduce bullying in schools.  They consulted specialists and made presentations.  They found a simple way to teach kids about bullying using the picture of a seesaw.  Sometimes people seek power over others, what we call bullying behavior.  Sometimes people seek power under others, what we could call victim behavior.  We can also call it win lose and lose win.  What we really want, and what God wants, is power with, or win win, a balanced seesaw.  God calls us to love our neighbors as we love ourselves which means to not let someone bully us, nor let ourselves bully others.  When we are in an uncomfortable situation, we can ask ourselves about who is getting the power and who needs the power. That can help us get to a win win or balance.  Easier said than done. 

For those who feel powerless, and we probably all feel that from time to time, it is a great comfort to know that God will come and sort out those bullying sheep, those arrogant goats.  But as one wise theologian said, as soon as we sort people into those bullies and us victims, we are causing problems too.  He said that we shouldn’t assume we are the innocent heroes and they are the bad guys as it keeps us feeling self-righteous and smug and does nothing to rebalance the see saw.  It is a form of bullying in itself.  We strive to have power over the other people and their hurtful behavior, and we refuse to see that they might be hurting too.  We pretend that they are bad goats, not good sheep and can feel complacent or satisfied that God will get them.

The reality is more complicated, of course.  We are all human, and for the most part have all known what it is like to have little power and lots of power.  But as Christians, our role model is Jesus, whom we call divine Prime Minister, Ultimate President, King of kings, who is guiding both sheep and goats alike.  And we remember that Jesus, the king of kings, became a servant and asked us to be servants to each other.  In as much as you have been full of empathy for your neighbor, in as much as you have chosen power with instead of power over or power under, in as much as you have strived to understand others and treated them with respect, you have done this to Jesus.  What a powerful call and powerful message!  May we grow in wisdom, understanding, compassion and healthy servanthood, may we recognize the face of Jesus in everyone we meet.  Amen.