Love over Hate

If you ever want to know how a town or a village or a city is doing, ask a hairdresser or a cashier or a school bus driver.  They have their fingers on the pulse of the community in a way that others might not.  They are the ones who see us at our worst.  Bus drivers see our kids when they are sleepy or after a hard day’s work at school.  Grocery store clerks find one more turkey for the foodbank, or one more toy for Santa’s Anonymous.  They are the innkeepers of the Bethlehem story, the ones who make room for people who show up at inconvenient times.  They are not the star of the show, no one is going to write carols about them, or have saints’ days named after them or give them Nobel prizes or medals of bravery.  They are quiet people who show up, day after day, enduring long shifts, aching feet, and impossible customer requests while on minimum wage. The innkeeper barely gets mentioned in the Christmas story, and yet in some ways, he or she was the first person to respond with generosity and creativity to the Christmas Story.  Welcoming the stranger becomes the first act of the world responding to the good news of Jesus being with us.  Before the shepherds, before the three kings, there is the humble innkeeper, trying to come up with a creative solution to an impossible situation. 

Even though Mary and Joseph ended up in a barn, it was a shelter from the woes of the world that were pressing down on them.  According to Luke’s gospel, they faced a government that made unreasonable demands on ordinary people, ordering a census based on place of birth without regard for where they lived.  They had to travel in a time when the roads were not safe from wild animals or wilder bandits.  They had to travel through a country run by a foreign army speaking a foreign language.  They travelled to a town where there were no hospitals or ambulances if there was an accident, and no police to intervene in cases of violence.  Justice and healthcare came for the wealthy and influential, not for a poor family forced to relocate unexpectedly because of politics.

Today, we live in a world that glorifies powerful people.  We live in a world that promotes fear of anyone that doesn’t look like us or talk like us or live like us.  We live in a world where rumors spread faster than ever before, and stories that teach us to be scared multiply like snowflakes in a blizzard.  This year, we have heard political figures insulting Canadians and threatening our independence.  We’ve seen the return of measles causing many children to become sick.  We’ve seen the notwithstanding clause used to limit people’s fundamental human rights and pitch the public sector against the private sector.  We’ve also seen people responding with elbows up to rally behind our economy.  We’ve worked together to shop Canadian, and to keep Alberta in Canada.  We’ve spent tourist dollars in Canada, learning how beautiful our parks and cities are.  It hasn’t been easy.  It hasn’t been peaceful.  But it has been inspiring to see how we all, working together, do make a difference.

The story of the birth of a baby in a stinky barn with straw and dirt all around, is a reminder that God comes when we least expect it, into the messiness of our lives.  Whether our homes look pretty, and the tinsel and lights are just perfect, or whether there is clutter and wrapping paper everywhere, God shows up.  Or maybe we are struggling to keep the lights on and the heating bills paid.  Even in the direst of situations, God shows up in love. God shows up despite the messages of fear or anger, despite war and violence. God shows up at your door with an unexpected turkey, or at the post office, with a package you didn’t know was coming.  God shows up with a hug or a small box of chocolates.  God shows up in a phone call from someone you hadn’t heard from in a while.  Or God shows up by saying, hey, send a card to Auntie, it’s been ages. Go deliver Meals on Wheels. Help put on a Christmas dinner for folks who may be alone.  Call your family member, not to get into a big debate over vaccines, but just to say, I love you.  Or shovel your neighbor’s walk if they’ve been sick. We’ve seen what hatred and fear can do to a country, but we’ve also seen what love can do.  Even when we feel like we live in a barn, surrounded by animals, God still shows up in love to make a difference.  We can too!  Just like the innkeepers, the hairdressers, the bus drivers, the cashiers, let’s all do our part in 2026 by standing for love, compassion and empathy for all.  Spread the good news that Love is stronger than Hate, and be the love that someone else desperately needs to see.  

Two Sides to Every Story

 A one-act play with two characters based on Luke 7: 36-40, 44-48 and John 12:1–8 - To see our play, check out our Youtube channel at https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCGOciyyHXKzVL_yF27AXy3Q 

Setting: a press conference with reporters, cameras, microphones.  A disciple of Jesus approaches the podium, followed by a well-known lady who owns a perfume company in town.

Disciple: Welcome to today’s press conference, we wanted to clear up the misinformation around the incident last week in Bethany.  Get the story straight, as it were.  There are lots of rumors flying of conflict and division within the followers of Jesus and I’m here to tell you that we are not breaking up, we are a closely knit group who love and serve Jesus no matter what.  I’ve asked this lady here to clear up any misconceptions.  We’ll give you our statements and take questions at the end. 

Let me start by saying that the rumor that tempers flew and slapping occurred is completely wrong.  People lost their tempers, true enough, but nothing physical happened.  We had a disagreement over an impulsive action that we were concerned was sending the wrong message to our followers.   These things happen from time to time.  Really, it was a pleasant dinner with friends and nothing more than that.  Sure, discussions got a little intense, but you know what it’s like when you are sitting down at supper and there’s been a glass of wine or two.  We got relaxed and as always, we got into a debate about propriety and appropriateness.  Nothing more.  It’s the same kind of debate we have come to expect.  With Jesus, everything that happens becomes a teachable moment.  Am I right? (turns to lady beside him at the podium.)

Perfume seller:  A teachable moment? That’s one way to put it.  Many of you know me, I sell perfume and ointments in town.  Some folks think it’s scandalous for a woman to be the head of a business, especially one that sells smells for a variety of reasons.  Oils, perfumes, the usual stuff.  It’s nobody’s business what the buyer uses them for!  Sure, some folks look down at me because my customers include ladies of ill repute, but a tanner wants to smell nice when he goes home to his wife and kids.  Phew, that’s a stench anyone would want to cover up.  But I did not go to the dinner to start a fight.  I’ve been following Jesus, saw him a few times in person.  My heart went out to the guy.  He gives hope to everyone, and I got this feeling he needed someone to be generous to him.  That day I had a sense of foreboding that he’s in for rough times. He looked so tired too.  That story he told about the prodigal family last week had me in tears, and I just grabbed the most expensive stuff I had and crashed the dinner.  My favorite scent, used as a gift of love in times of need. Totally spur of the moment!

Disciple: a gift of love?  You got to be kidding!  More like a trauma trigger. Poor Judas really flipped out.  Last time he smelled that was when they buried his dad and brother.  It all came flooding back to him.  Some Roman soldiers didn’t like their looks and picked a fight with them.  Of course Judas’ dad didn’t have a chance and the brother was just a kid.  That’s why Judas hates Romans so much and wants a king to take over the country and chase them out.  He was not the only one.  (turns to perfume seller) Many of us felt upset with you popping the cork on a funeral oil and slathering it on Jesus, his head and feet. It’s ridiculous to walk around beside a living human being who smells like a funeral home.  And the cost of that stuff!  A year’s wages!  Judas wasn’t the only one to think that splurging on such an expensive product in such a bizarre way was a waste!  Ever since we’ve been following Jesus, we’ve heard, “Share this, be generous with that, take care of the poor, feed the hungry, be like the widow woman who tithes from what she has, give your clothes away, don’t store up treasures on earth.  Honestly, the only thing Jesus likes more than talking about money is physically healing people.  Curing blindness, leprosy, mental illness, bleeding, you name it, he’s healed it.

Perfume seller:  Well, your welcome wasn’t very healing or generous to me.  But I’ve felt the healing of Jesus firsthand.   There have been times when I haven’t been the nicest person in the world.  I have cared more for my business profits than for my customers.  I have cared more about making a quick buck out my back door when the officials or tax collectors weren’t looking.  I have cared more about my standing in society, even if no matter what I say or do, I’m still seen as lesser than some of the holier-than-thou scholars who don’t know how hard it is to make an honest living, okay mostly honest living as a female.  And I didn’t crash that dinner party to get anything from Jesus.  I crashed it because I felt that Jesus needed love and courage that day.  He is so kind, but he is so human, too.  And I lost it.  I cried for him, I cried for my own brokenness, and I cried for how blind we can be when someone so precious to us, worth more than all the perfume in the world, is taken for granted.  We need to listen to him, hear his stories, change our ways.  He’s onto something here, and he’s changed my life for the better! I’m sorry that it hurt Judas and you, I never thought of it that way.  I will think of how my actions might impact others next time. I want to be a better person, and what Jesus told me that night is helping me be that better person. Thanks for sharing your point of view!

Disciple: Well, it’s been eye-opening hearing your side too.  As a follower of Jesus, you’d think I would know by now that there are many viewpoints, many sides to every story.  And yours is just as valuable as mine. I need to be more generous in my welcome, and not jump to conclusions about peoples’ actions quite so fast.  On that note, I think that wraps up this press conference, folks.  Thanks for coming and hearing the two sides of this event!

End scene

Kumbaya Oh Lord!

I remember learning to sing Kumbaya in school and at camp, and it was simple, fun, and open to as many verses as we could come up with. But over the years, Kumbaya has become a symbol of shallow togetherness, artificial peace and pretend harmony.  Everyone gathered around the campfire singing of simple times and not really knowing what the song is about.

So Kumbaya, for better or worse, has gotten a bad rap over the last 10 or 20 years.  And I’d bet that Peter was thinking his time of discipleship with Jesus would be one long singalong campfire joyful healing experience as Jesus and the disciples wandered around from one town to another getting rave reviews and growing their numbers.

Jesus had other ideas and clearly articulated them to his disciples.  That’s when Peter lost it.  He jumped up, pulled Jesus aside and accused him of messing with the mood, of being a Debbie Downer instead of a ra ra leader.

Which led to conflict and what we call ‘a teachable moment’.

Conflict is not a pleasant thing at the best of times.  It leaves us feeling unsettled, squeamish and upset.  I remember when I was little hiding under the sofa with my hands clamped over my ears when my parents had arguments.  But surprisingly, when two ministers of the United Church took a sabbatical in 2019 to study thriving congregations, they found that thriving congregations were not ones of no conflict, singing Kumbaya around the campfire, but ones that did have conflict.  So many congregations, especially since the big splits in the 1980’s and 90’s.  They worry about losing members because of differing opinions.  They avoid conflict at all costs and unfortunately that can cost their ability to thrive and be healthy.

Now I’m not saying that a healthy congregation pulls out the boxing gloves and lets people take a piece out of each other until everyone’s rage is spent, but conflict can be done in loving and respectful ways.  If we try to cover up the rubbing points, it can be like blocking up the spout of a kettle that’s plugged in.  When the water reaches boiling temperature, there’s no where for the steam to go and the kettle explodes.  But if we can be open to communicating that we’re feeling a little hot, we can unplug our kettles before we boil over, and that is what leads to healthier, thriving congregations.

How do thriving congregations handle conflict?  Well, going back to the Mark passage, we see some things that Peter gets right and Jesus gets right, and some things Peter gets wrong and even Jesus messes up.  Who wins in this ancient boxing match?

Jesus states his mission and his values, his goals and his objectives clearly and articulately.  Point to Jesus.  He does so openly to the whole group, no secrets or side conversations.  Another point.

Peter hears something that bothers him, and he decides to talk to Jesus directly.  He doesn’t start rumors or complain to the other disciples behind Jesus’ back, or even stomp off in disgust, which is the equivalent of the kettle blowing up.  He decides to talk to Jesus about it.  That’s a point for Peter.

Peter then pulls Jesus aside and speaks to him quietly, not in public, another point for Peter.  When we correct people in public, especially if that’s the only thing that we do, we are shaming and embarrassing them.  That is not respectful or loving.  So far it’s a tie, Jesus 2 points, Peter 2 points.

But then it goes off the rails into a full-out yelling match.

Peter assumes that he knows what’s best for the group.  Bring out the guitars, he tells Jesus, let’s make this a happy sing along, enough with the gloom and doom.  Peter is not the slightest bit curious as to why Jesus would say what he said.  Peter is not interested in building understanding, only in pushing his agenda.  He loses a point for this. Peter 1, Jesus 2.

Jesus gets mad and lets ‘er rip!  He resorts to name calling, my favorite version is in King James, “Get Thee Behind Me Satan!” So often we see folks resorting to name calling instead of discussing facts.  I certainly see that a lot on the internet.  Labelling is a losing argument.  Jesus loses a point.  Still tied but now it’s 1 point each.

Then Jesus scores two more decisive points.  He gathers everyone together and doesn’t say “Well Peter, you smell like fish, and your fingernails are dirty.  Trim your beard and wash your sailor’s shirt.”  No shaming or blaming here.  Jesus 2 Peter 1.

And Jesus gets the second point by restating and rearticulating his vision and mission.  “It’s not about your comfort or your fame or your happiness.  It’s about the good news of God coming and being here and now for everyone not just the entitled.”  Jesus 3, Peter 1

Peter gains points to finish the match.  He sticks around to listen, he doesn’t stomp off saying “I quit”.  And he really thinks about it.  Tie game.  Or as conflict experts say, “Win win”.  No back stabbing, no gossiping, no nitpicking.  He buys in to the mission and ministry.  He buys into the message.

And what is that message?  That God is coming in the midst of our fears, our loneliness, our isolation, our frustration, our despair.  That the prayer of African American slaves as they were beaten would be heard.  They cried out “Come by here my Lord, Come by here”, “Someone’s praying Lord, come by here”, desperate prayers for freedom, prayers for courage in the face of the Ku Klux Klan carrying torches, and they found the strength and courage to travel all the way here despite such terrible treatment, to make lives for themselves and their children free of slavery and injustice.

Now more than ever we too live in times where courage and strength are needed.  We live in times where Kumbaya is more than a campfire song.  And we live in the knowledge that God is with us, we are not alone, thanks be to God!