It’s good to
be back from vacation and it’s good to be doing all kinds of things getting
ready for the fall. One of the things I
got to do this week is to witness the power of words spoken from the heart, out
at Amber Valley yesterday. I asked a
group of people if they would support two young people as they made vows to
love and honor and support each other.
The folks that were there to witness these vows almost thundered their
response of I Will to the question of “Will you honor the commitments these two
young people make today. It was really
touching, the power of these words on the two young people. Loud words spoken in truth and love and wisdom,
but also with pride and deep conviction.
I think that
those words were spoken in the true sense of the good news that Jesus and James
were trying to share. Sounds like these
two men were on the same page when they thought about what people say out
loud. Which shouldn’t be too surprising
since James was Jesus’ younger brother. How
often did they hear angry words? And how often have we too been on the brunt
end of angry words or lies or slander and envy? Probably more that we’d like to
admit. But James also asks us to examine
our own words and actions, not just dwelling on what we hear others say.
This week I
heard others say things ranging from insensitive to angry to downright
insulting. Sometimes it was about
someone not in the room, sometimes it was to someone’s face. Sometimes it was on the news and caused
international discussions, sometimes it was right here in Athabasca. And sometimes it was so subtle that one had
to really think about what the person had said before it came home how hurtful
the intention was. Sometimes it tried to
hide behind humor, and sometimes it even came out of my own heart and I didn’t
realize it until it was out of my mouth.
Whoops! And Yikes!
Sometimes it
was the words that did not get said that hurt, like how for many folks, Pope
Francis did not say enough. Sometimes it
was the words said to a person so hurting that they over reacted. Sometimes it was words that brought up memories
of other words that hurt.
No wonder
Jesus talked about the heart, the interior emotions causing what he called
uncleanliness. Koino-ew, in Greek,
meaning dirty, common, and unholy. He and the religious scholars of the day were
all concerned about anything that would separate them from God, but they were
divided as to what that separation was caused by. What builds walls between us
and God? The Pharisees thought it was made
by what people did or how they did, but Jesus and James thought it was caused
by our interior states. That sometimes
we are not 100% logical, and that sometimes our words are clear symptoms of the
state of our interior selves. As one
psychologist put it,
“Bad news,
friend: you are not a rational person. Turns out most of your opinions and
decisions are made up of an unsavory soup of prejudice, first impressions, old
hurts, snap judgements, and fantasy, with some actual fact and reasoned thought
thrown in for spice. In case it makes you feel better: same here. Same
everywhere. We tend to think of humans as highly rational, but it just isn't
so. Google "are humans rational?" or "do facts change
minds?" Dig one layer down past the fluff pieces and listicles and see
what science actually has to say about our minds—not that I expect any of the
information there to change yours, if you're like the rest of us.”
That can be
a pretty bleak way of looking at ourselves, and it would be easy to give
up. We are full of what Steven Covey called
the 5 cancerous ways to talk to others – complain, criticise, compare, compete
and contend. All five of these tend to tear
down community, to tear down peoples souls, to destroy hope, to undermine love,
and to sabotage faith. They are
addictive and habit-forming and can grow out of control, hurting everyone who
hears them.
But James
and Jesus both paint a picture of better things. Of words spoken that can build each other up,
that can strengthen communities, that can help our faith grow.
Words like “I
do” and “We will” spoken with passion, conviction and hope. Words spoken out loud where other people will
hear and witness what has been said.
Such is the power of the Serenity Prayer, which has been used in many
different versions for over 80 years to help folks with wounded hearts. Folks that some people would label as unclean
or unable to change. Simple words that
have helped people look into that mirror and truly see themselves for whom they
are. Flawed humans struggling to deal with
the cards life has handed them, and who humbly and gently rebuild themselves
with words from the inside out.
God Grant me
the Serenity to accept the things I can change, the courage to change the
things I can and the wisdom to know the difference.
When I get
down and discouraged from hearing complaining and criticizing words, or
thinking that I can’t change the world I live in, I am going to do my best to
remember yesterday. Because that noisy
crowd of folks wearing plaid shirts, cowboy hats and john deer baseball caps,
with hip flasks, cowboy boots and running shoes, looking like the reddest of
red neck Albertans, whooped and hollered and cheered and vowed to support the
two lovely brides as they exchanged kisses in front of all their guests. What a gift to that young couple that said I
do, that their families and friends supported them regardless of their
gender. So when I think or we think that
what we do or say in this country, this province and this town doesn’t matter,
know that Jesus and James would be proud of how our witness to love is building
a safer world for all kinds of people that were once thought as unclean. God wants us to live in hope and love and
truth, not anger or fear, and when our hearts are centered in hope, love, truth
and wisdom, it is contagious, we do make a difference in this world.
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